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I know-- it's sad-- I've been using live journal for over four years! But it's time to move on! See you there!

Anais has been in Europe for about two weeks, and she returns this Saturday evening. I cannot wait to see her-- my beautiful little friend.

When she left for London, I felt confident that I would be okay. After all, two weeks is really not that long of a time. But I think because of the abrupt change of environment, meaning, not being able to speak with her every night over the phone because of the time zone difference, the frantic little boy inside me couldn't help but come out. And I am just noticing tonight how easily irritated I was, on the subway, at work, at choir practice, at the Men's Fellowship meetings. I had just blown up at Jeremy (God bless that man) about how disappointed I was with the Men's Ministry at Trinity, when just a week ago, I had been greatly optimistic about it. Thankfully, he responded in a way that helped me to make some sense of how I was feeling. So the week may not end so badly now.

What can I say-- not being able to consult Anais about anything going on in my life made me quite sensitive to anything that normally would not disturb me. There are plenty of times that I just wanted to lay the smack down on an old lady on the train. I mean, thank God I somehow maintained a cool demeanor on the outside. On the inside? Hello Kitty on crack.

But all is cool. I honestly was excited for her the entire time she had been in Europe, specifically London and Spain. I had been praying for her a great deal in fact especially regarding her flights. But I would be lying if I said I didn't miss her...
T H I S M U C H .

Here is how I know I miss her:

I am just realizing how much I had taken her for granted-- especially her being here in New York. Oh Lord, there is no woman more attractive to me than one who is both wise and beautiful. And when I say "wise," I don't necessarily mean smart, although Anais is extremely intelligent-- but wise in the sense that she provides sharp, godly advice. There are without a doubt, plenty of smart women in the world. Everybody knows that. But being smart does not necessarily mean one holds good moral judgment nor is capable of providing good advice regarding personal decisions in life. I enjoy nothing else more than to just sit and talk about everything under the sun with her. I need the intellectual outlet that I get from discussing so many different topics with her each week, political, social, spiritual, personal, emotional. The list is endless. And even if I have nothing to say, I could just sit there and listen to her speak for hours. It has become one of the most important parts of the week for me. To just sit down, and be with her. Period.

And so, I sit here in my apartment, late at night, wondering: what in the world did she do to me? I am not supposed to be so irritable, yet the absence of this particular woman has driven me far outside my element. I cannot blame myself. If any man is able to find such an attractive woman, he will find it best to never let her go! If anybody wants to see a man fall apart-- take away his love.

Words cannot express how grateful I am that the weather is clearing up, and getting warmer. Here comes the sun.

Work at AIU is picking up fast. It seems as if the more I display my understanding of what's going on in Trade Credit, the more responsibility is handed down. And FINALLY- I have a new e-mail address for that office and no longer have to share with someone else. I do, however, get a bit irritated when people are kurt and even rude with me over the phone. For example, I called one Insured inquiring about whether or not they currently had a Collection Agency working on recovering their original losses from the Buyer. Almost immediately the client began bombarding with questions like "who are you-- what's it matter to you-- what is your role in the company-- who is AIU-- blah blah blah," even despite the fact that I had CLEARLY introduced myself and explained my reason for calling. Why not just answer the simple question. Do you or do you not currently have an agency working on recovering your losses? Anyways, thank God for e-mail. I won't be making phone calls anymore.

Anais is away, in Europe. She left for London Monday night. She, her sister, and brother-in-law are probably heading to Spain about now. So yeah-- Dave is all alone in the city. I haven't realized how much I would miss Anais until now. And even worse, I don't know what to do with myself. Ah, relationships. It's what happens. I miss her so, so much but I am totally excited for her. I, on the otherhand, have an LSAT coming up in about-- whoa, A MONTH! Prayer, fasting, studying.

I'm busy though. Unlike my first year, alone, in the city, I've been rather fired up about doing work for the Lord. This all kind of happened during the past three weeks. I'm excited about the Men's Ministries and am in the process of brainstorming with other leaders, ways to reach out. It is tough to get men more involved with church if their relationship with the Lord is not secure. It's just tough! There will always be something more important. But when YOUR eyes are fixed on Christ, and YOU have that hunger to reach out and do some ministry-- going to church is no longer a mere Sunday tradition; but rather, it is something you long for all week. I think maintaining a close brotherhood in the Church through fellowship and even DISCIPLESHIP, will abet in the growth of strong God-loving men.

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again"

Work at the Firm is picking up again, at least in my area. I hear rumors of a possible building change, but most likely I will only come to find out about it on the day of the move. I highly doubt we will move closer to mid-town considering a good many of our clients remain in the Financial District, but who knows. What I do know, is that people enter meetings at this Firm with great FEAR. "Thanks for coming to the meeting everyone-- oh, by the way, we're letting you go. Yeah so the weather's lookin' nice out--"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6D6PhN0_Qc

For the past three weeks I have been working at another office in the mornings. American International Underwriters is the insurance claims business of the well-known AIG, and I had been sent over there by Mr. Lynch to help analyze claims files. It has been nice to get away from Coverage work for a bit and find myself in a new environment, though over at AIU, we are not allowed to access our GMAIL accounts nor chat interfaces. Oh well. The people I have met there so far are cool, so I am content with being there overall. Thus far, I have the understanding that my job is to conduct a preliminary review of the files, recommending whether or not there is potential for AIG to recover losses of the Insured. As expected, many of the Insured's Buyers have defaulted on their payments, gone out of business, or filed for Chapter 7 or Chapter 11 Bankruptcy. So it has been quite the learning experience, investigating the current status of various Buyers and looking into any Bankruptcy procedures, Transfer of Claims, etc. Thankfully, and I am truly grateful, there has been a learning curve to my benefit, but so far everybody has been very helpful.

My LSAT exam is this June, and yes it is paid for: $130.00 I recall. I feel that of the two years I've studied for this exam since graduating from Syracuse, I only really buckled down and consistently prepared for the past six months. I have seen great improvement since I took a practice a year ago, but we'll see. I'm keeping my eyes on the prize.

I've also been facilitating a Men's Group at Trinity Baptist Church since Amol and his wife (God bless them) recently moved to a place deeper in New Jersey, which would definitely make it more difficult for him to regularly attend our group, let alone, our church. It has been a challenge and a blessing, considering I feel that I was suddenly thrown in a position where I would need to prepare the basic agenda and lesson each week. But without a doubt, a group such as this is incredible to have in any church and I would encourage all men to become more involved with an accountability group of this sort. I will not find a group of men so honest and transparent as those who attend an accountability group. Because this is a more public platform, I will be happy to discuss the details of an accountability group via e-mails: dkim017@gmail.com, of course if you have questions. Just know, the ultimate purpose of these ministries is to draw men closer to the living God. And yes, I personally do believe in God and I'm confident that know Him at a personal level.

Our choir recently partook in the church's Tenebrae service. I thought the service was powerful-- a good reminder of what God did as a result of His love for the world. Imagine, God becoming human. Why would He do that? There is no other story, no religion, who presents to the world a God who could yearn to dwell amongst His people that badly. Did God walk among His people? Yes. Proof? Jesus.

Oh Funk. Doodle.

An old man once told me that rules without morals is nothing but an old dog's religion-- the same old shiznat and no meaning behind it all.

I think the same way, I have to agree. Many lives are precious, indeed, yet they are lame. They amount to nothing but a set pattern of living without questioning the most important question: why oh why sir?

The problem with a portion of our population is evident: they chase after freedoms without questioning the morals. In my honest opinion, just because one has the "right" to do something does not necessarily mean one SHOULD do it. After all, is that not how corporate giants roam the earth? One needs not be a genius to realize that religious living does not pertain only to those who go to Church, or believe in God. People in general are religious. The corporate giants are run by religious men-- religious to their so-called duties, their fancy shirts and neck-ties, their legally-binding retention bonus contracts. Everybody holds a Bible in their hand, it may not be a Judeo-Christian Bible, but it is their own Bible. They obey the "Sabbath" but they do not think to extend a hand to help one in need. They say, "as long as the Law says I'm okay, then I'm okay." Yet morality is not even on their minds.

Our society is slitting its own wrists from religious living, or the rules without morals. Nobody stops to ask whether or not they stand on moral ground but rather pay attention to the system, how it works, the ways to benefit from it, how to work around it. "Morality is subjective" say the clowns who constantly push for more and more rights without brains. They cannot look past their fat noses; they only see the now. BUT, "you reap what you sow."

Fortunate for some of us, we learn from history. Unfortunate for the rest of us, we learn from our hardships. After falling head first into a muddy ditch, it is then that most of us learn to pay attention to the path-- and where it eventually leads. Either route, people who learn are wise. Those who walk with blind folds, wanting to deny the effects of mere religious living, keep their heads in the sand, simply awaiting destruction to hit.

Friends, those people are just stupid.

It does not appear that the economic stimulus is as popular as the Obama Administration had hyped it up to be. For example, apparently the stimulus had been constructed behind closed doors, with almost no Republican involvement what so ever. Evidence? Come time for votes, the stimulus received zero Republican votes from the House and only three from the Senate. Contrary to Obama’s claim to reach across party lines, the economic stimulus was as bi-partisan as could be.

There is also a bit of controversy over whether or not too much power is being wielded in the hands of Lawrence H. Summer in particular, who is the National Economic Council Chair and directly advises Obama’s economic policies both internationally and domestically. Nobody else appears to be involved in this policy-making process except maybe Geithner, whose thoughts are almost exactly alike with Summers’ anyways.

Also included in the stimulus plan is a highly controversial “Buy American” provision which those opposed claim may ultimately create humanitarian crises in relatively poor foreign countries such as China, India, Russia. Why? The Buy American provision will require public works, schools supplies, and future construction projects to be purchased from American companies. The plan is very pro-American which is fine generally speaking, but when it is at the cost of creating further humanitarian crisis overseas, it will most likely be met with opposition to those who care about human lives and suffering.

The stimulus plan will allocate approximately 40% for tax breaks (which the middle and lower class seems to only care about) and 60% to spending on social programs, such as improvements on green technology. But what the Obama Administration fails to realize is that huge borrowing will greatly increase inflation in America, reducing the value of the dollar, weakening the purchasing power of consumers, and scaring away foreign capital.

While Bush was heavily criticized by the liberal media for less popular policies made under his presidency, people held President-elect Obama on such a high pedestal for an Administration that he had yet to be a part of. For example, I agree that it is a truly honorable goal to reduce the national deficit to 3% by 2013, but at the cost of removing American protection in Iraq? Personally, I thought it was rather noble for the United States to involve itself in the humanitarian affairs in Iraq, thrusting Saddam Hussein out of power and attempting to rebuild a free society for all Iraqis. What about the rise of insurgents? Actually, there are trends of them seeking safe haven outside of Iraq due to United States military presence there. Plus let’s face it, there would always be an insurgent force in whatever country the United States lends a helping hand, usually in opposition to a repressive regime. But people, namely democrats, will claim that Iraq is in no better a condition at present than it was prior to the U.S. “invasion.” In response, I say that it is truly naïve to believe that the condition of a state can be accurately described in such a short period of time. We will see how Iraq fares ten years from now and to whom any successes will be accredited to.

In my opinion, though Bush may not have been the most “intelligent” President of the United States, under his administration, his foreign policy goals seemed to be centered around helping those who could not help themselves against their own repressive governments, or regimes. For instance, according to America.gov, “the United States has doubled assistance to Africa during the Bush administration -- the largest expansion of foreign aid since the reconstruction of postwar Europe under the Marshall Plan. As Bush prepared to set off for a six-day, five-nation tour of the region, with stops in Benin, Tanzania, Rwanda, Ghana and Liberia, he reflected on Africa’s progress over the past decade and pledged continued U.S. support in a February 14 speech at Washington’s National Museum of African Art. Bush has demonstrated his commitment to Africa through the African Growth and Opportunity Act, which has created new livelihoods by tripling African exports to the United States, as well as the creation of the Millennium Challenge Corporation (MCC), which has provided $5.5 billion in assistance above and beyond traditional U.S. aid programs to nations that demonstrate their commitment to fighting corruption and governing justly and invest in the health and education of their citizens.”

Also, regarding China, “the Bush administration overlapped extensively with the almost eight-year reign of Taipei's provocatively nationalistic Democratic Progressive Party government of President Chen Shui-bian” according to Knoxnews.com. “Mincing no words, the Bush-Cheney team handled the entire situation with great wisdom and restraint. The same can be said about handling China's "rise" in general, including refusing to go off the deep end in response to various missteps and gaffes by Beijing - e.g., the satellite shoot-down test, the occasional spy scandal, refusing U.S. Navy ships safe harbor in a storm, the Tibet/Olympic torch protests. Instead, what we got from a Bush administration, whose neocons came into power clearly itching for confrontation with China (remember the E-P3 plane incident in 2001), was a steady hand at the wheel. Now, with the Kuomingtang's return to power on the island, we're looking at the near-term demise of the Taiwan war scenario between the U.S. and China.”

But of course if you're like me and you read the New York Times and Washington Post every morning, you may have voted for Obama thinking he's the savior and Bush was the devil. Too late to retract my vote.

So, I watched a video posted on Soul Shepherd's blog which attempted to debunk the Bible in 10 minutes. Debunk it in 10 minutes really? Last time I checked, the examples they used represented like 2% of scripture, which is the amount I think most unbelievers read anyways(except for "biblical scholars"--whatever that means.) Creation Story? Check. Noah's Ark? Check. Moses and the Red Sea thing? Check. Jesus' miracles? Check. I think if you ever watched those Hannah Barbara Bible cartoons in Sunday School, you probably know as much as the guys on the video. People read these accounts with a highlighter and an encyclopedia in hand, close the book, and somehow determine that "the entire Bible is Bull S@#%!" then go on a sarcastic/bitter rampage (or just become mini-versions of Jon Stewart) against Christians-- yet at the end of the day, they are somehow open minded. Ahh-- stop claiming there is a God! I just want to believe that the entire Universe just came from a floating rock in a vacuum that just so happened to spontaneously combust! Hm. You ask me, I think the "Creation" story in Astronomy 101 was pretty funked up itself. Nobody seemed to know where that darn rock or floating mass came from in the first place prior to the Big Bang. Or what created the particles and atoms that ignited it? Do YOU know? Was it Mr. Bean? It was Mr. Bean, wasn't it? I knew it. The English started everything, THEN came the Americans. Could the Big Bang have occured? Why certainly. Does it debunk the Bible? Of course not. Give the author of Genesis (Moses) some credit. It's not easy to describe how amazing God is, especially back when the words "Scooby Doo" probably didn't even exist. Whether or not God literally created Adam and Eve out of the dust, or whether or not Satan took the form of a snake, I can hardly convince myself that the Universe came to be without Him. I'll be back to pick at this topic. Just you wait kids.

Slightly diverging: when the heck did people conclude that Christianity was a Western religion or influence? Since the Southern Baptist Convention was created? Oh right, because the United States is just oozing with Jesus believers. Once again, last time I checked, Christianity began in the Middle East. I'm not talking about flaky Crusaders who were no different than today's suicide-bomber Islamists. I'm talking about the real deal, Apostle Paul and first disciples who were thrown in jail, beaten, most of them martyred, all to share the Good News of Christ. We should start calling it the Middle Eastern movement. That'll confuse the insurgents, Osama, and his hooligans. Or at least it'll mess them up when recording their video tapes that purposefully leak. Jesus was Jewish. He was more Jewish than the Jews (what?) because He actually understood the point of all scripture written prior to His time. At age 12, He knew more than the religious teachers. But no. People prefer religion because it is so much easier to follow rules and to make believe they are natural saints, than to have a relationship with God. I mean, come on. The number of jokes out there about marriage and relationships? Endless.

I think I got snooped. Maybe I shouldn't be posting this, but hey, no names will be mentioned. A girl I very briefly dated in high school (you know how relationships go then) added me as a friend a few months ago, I accepted, and now she is no longer my friend. Call me crazy but I think there's a pattern going on with her. Ah yes, high school-- where the most important part of a relationship is getting into one, then after that, things are positively destined to spiral downward, crash, and burn in flames that only God Himself could squelch. There is a lot of crying involved in high school, and over the most worthless things, like the day the school blocked AIM from the computer lab. Actually, that was a big deal then. But we grow, and those of us who spend much time fighting against the mainstream crowd become 1.) goths living with parents, or 2.) intelligent, aspiring young professionals. The mainstream pump gas or run for the county dairy queen pageant (just kidding.)

I think computer class was the one period during the day in which all the students were possibly smarter than the teacher. It was like a full-time job in itself for the teacher to figure out all the sites which should be blocked. And some geek kid named Danny or something would create a virus that spread throughout the network, and when the school found out, that kid would have a note sent home to his mom. That kid's glory lived on for like a few days before everybody just saw him a nose-picker and nose-bleeder once again. By the year's end all sites except the Library's electronic catalogue would be blocked, in which case, there was no point in using the internet anymore. And to think-- it all started with learning how to load those gigantic floppy disks into the disk drive in '91 and playing Math Munchers and Oregon Trail on the Apple II.

Anais caught a bit of the pre-Spring rhinovirus this past weekend, and so we spent most of our time in-doors watching movies like Cinderella (no- the version starring Hillary Duff) on ABC Family. By the end of the movie we both agreed that teenage girls don't seem to realize that regardless of how cute the boy is and how hard they fight to "get the guy," the very fact that they are teenagers, meant there was really a 99.9% chance the relationship wouldn't last. That should settle it. In fact, in most romantic movies, we obviously don't see past the end credits, and we remain unaware of how the relationship goes after the first kiss or the wedding. They leave out the morning farts. Nobody mentioned that the Little Mermaid and her prince filed for divorce soon after their children were caught by fisherman off the coast of New Guinea. I mean, that was tough on the parents yah? And nobody mentioned after Sleeping Beauty married her prince, she died from the Bubonic Plague.

I rented "Sleeping Beauty" on Netflix not long ago. Clearly a classic title. I mean, the Princess' name was Aurora-- it just doesn't get more Medieval than that. But you know, all the ruckus with the evil Queen/sorceress, could have been avoided had the good King and Queen just invited her to the baby's first birthday. Lesson? Don't be hatin'.

I spent all night making a sign to pin outside my bedroom door whenever I am about to go to sleep. Yeah, I totally didn't spend all night, but it's awesome. I wrote it on lined-loose leaf, with a blue high-lighter. Now that I think about it, it might suck a little 'cause I'm not sure if any of my roommates could read it when the living room light was turned off. But the message rocks: "I'M SLEEPING, PLEASE BE QUIET." Straight to the point. Admit it, if you didn't have a sensitive relationship with your roommate(s), you would utilize this sign every night, especially if you tend to wake up at 2 in the morning to the sound of dishes being washed, plastic bags being shuffled around almost aimlessly, and someone slamming the butt of a kitchen knife into frozen meat. Wow, I got way too specific.

I need one more sign regarding hair that always lurks in the shower drain. I feel like as soon as the water hits the tub floor, the hair just swishes around, forcing me to play hop-scotch or "skip-it" with it. It's like poop and I'm trying to avoid stepping on it. Yes, that's right-- I brought back "skip-it." I tip my hat off to Nintendo for coming out with the Wii, but I'm sorry, your kid will still be fat even after playing Mario Tennis for five hours straight each day, the only difference between Wii and a regular game console like Xbox is that he or she will probably develop tennis elbow at the age of 12. We must start a campaign to resurrect all games children used to play before Atari hit American homes. Like-- um, game boards. 'Cause you definitely burn calories rolling dice in a plastic cup and screaming Yahtzee.

You know what's the worst as a little kid, or even as an adult? Playing Pictionary and being stuck with the one person who couldn't draw worth crap. I mean, the object could be a snake or something easy like that, and the person would draw like a vortex opening up in space with projectile vomit coming out shooting lasers at various hairy monkeys floating through time and space. And when you guess: "vortex opening up in space with projectile vomit coming out shooting lasers at various hairy monkeys floating through time and space", your partner rolls his or her eyes and is like, "no you idiot, it's a snake." Then everybody looks at you like they knew what it was.

I could be such a sore loser though, especially in grade school. For the most part I enjoyed engaging in friendly snowball fights with my older brother until of course I caught one in the face. Then I'd run into the house, screaming for my mom to pack me ice. But gosh darn it, my brother compacted those things like he was out to kill Hitler, or at least it seemed like deep-seated hatred and other emotions were just carefully and ever so perfectly woven into each snowball with my name on it. I mean, I think he truly intended to permanently damage me in some way-- really leave his mark tattooed on my face for life. Sigh. Older siblings. Actually, I recall catching many baseballs in the face during little league season. If I was smarter then, I would have wore the glove on my face and been the best on the team, instead of that one kid who seemed to be good at every sport. But then again, I can see how my life would be different today, if I was much smarter way back when.

I remember taking an IQ test in kindergarten. I was in a small room with the school counselor, Sandy, and my mother was there of course. Once the counselor asked me: David, what color is water? And I answered "silver." I wonder if that affected the rest of my education and what classes I took. Doesn't this make you wonder the path upon which you came to be who you are today? Did some hippy named Sandy just determine how my life turned out?

No, I don't think the IQ test in kindergarten determined anything. I mean, thanks to Facebook, I now realize that certain kids who everybody thought were geniuses in fifth grade, turned out to be complete morons today, or at least they are mediocre. Instead, I think psychologists should figure out which kid is most likely going to smoke pot. Now THAT will be a more accurate determinant as to what makes or breaks the Genius Kid.